Catching up, Bullet point style...

Sorry for the unintended hiatus. In the past, it has been the Razor's modus operandi that if I don't have time to do something right, I throw it together haphazardly and publish it. This month it seems, even that has been impossible. To get caught up, some bullet points:

• Noticed the Time Magazine "Man of the Year" was awarded to a young man who started a website. Alas, it wasn't me. The Facebook guy...
• Got a Christmas Card from my Uncle Larry (who due to his dedication to the Razor, is quickly becoming one of my favorite uncles) and Aunt Fannie. They addressed it to me, and all of my staff at the Razor. Made me laugh.
• I missed the E-Visceration® I had planned for David Sconyers' birthday (12/17). Which is particularly tragic when you consider how old he is. Might not get to use it next year. Perhaps the eulogy?
• I've been considering adopting a child from a 3rd world country. It breaks my heart to see the deplorable conditions in the sweatshops where many of these kids are forced to work. Wouldn't it be fun to have his/her birthday party at Build-A-Bear Workshop?
• Did you hear about that kid who choked to death on the little Adam's apple from the boardgame "Operation"?
• Sorry about those last two bullet points, been dabbling in Irony lately.
• We the people of the USA. Jose, that doesn't include you, ese. (Admittedly, this joke works better in the spoken word, and would've been more timely a few months ago when illegal immigration was all the rage.)
• Do you have any idea how dumb I feel when someone asks me want I want for Christmas and I direct them to my website? Somewhere between pretty and very.
• I was looking for a way to end this post when my sister had the misfortune of sending me this text message: "Where is >redacted<'s gift being shipped too?" Knowing my policy on ending sentences with prepositions (I'm against it), she thoughtfully added an o to the end of "to" and rendered her question nonsensical. Cool.

If you see anyone that knows me, tell them I said "Merry Christmas".

Word Cloud, Update on Saleh, &c.

In hindsight it was kinda dumb to drop out of Alicia Keys' "Digital Life Sacrifice" two days before she met her goal. Perhaps it was the Razor's dead weight that was holding them back. At the time, I had about a million things to blog, didn't think she'd ever make it, and pulled the plug. As it turns out, I forgot whatever it was I was so excited to blog about and didn't have time to write anyway.

For the record, Stewart Rahr, a Brooklyn-born Billionaire donated $500,000 to help them crest the $1 million hurdle. I could probably write an entire post about how empty his life must be that he'd donate half a million bucks to get celebs back on Twitter, but for now, we'll salute his generosity and move on.
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Ever heard of a word cloud? A word cloud is a visual depiction of a sample of writing, typically used to describe the content of a web site. Here is a word cloud from the Razor:


The more frequently a word is used, the larger it is depicted in the cloud. Go to tagxedo if you want to make one of your own. I find my Cloud pretty fascinating and I think it depicts the Razor about right.
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A quick update on Razor-Hero Amrullah al Saleh? I got an e-mail from a friend of his, it is reproduced here:

Dear Adam,

I just wanted to let you know that I met Mr. Saleh in Panjshir, and I showed him the photo of your wristband you’d sent me. He asked me to pass on his appreciation to you. I returned from Afghanistan to D.C. recently. I just forwarded your email to him as well.

Best,
Ahmad

If you're new to the Razor or have forgotten about Saleh, you can read my previous posts about him in the archives. In a later email, Ahmad told me that he had forwarded my contact info to Saleh, selfishly I hope to hear from him someday...
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See ya.

Digital Resurection!

Talk about a backfire.

Last week I joined Alicia Keys and her friends in a goofy attempt to raise $1million for an AIDS related charity. I joined for two reasons. First, I wanted to point out the idiocy of celebrities "dying" on Facebook and Twitter in a silly attempt to blackmail their fans. Second, I figured it would only take a couple hours to raise the money and I was going to proclaim that the Razor (and its Slicers) were instrumental in raising the cash.

On the first count, it seems that the ridiculousness of the project didn't need pointing out. As I go to press, they are still only half way to their goal. It seems that most of their Facebook "friends" and Twitter "followers" don't care enough about social networking to actually pay for it. So my parody fell flat, and not for the first time...

And my estimation that they would raise the money quickly and I could heap glory on myself for having participated? Way off! I've seen dozens of things I wanted to blog, couldn't because I'd declared myself dead, and must now "resurrect" my digital self and my blog without receiving the glory that I so desperately desired.

Alicia baby, I love you. You were awesome in Jay-Z's "Empire State of Mind". I hope you guys raise kazillions of dollars for your charity. I fully believe in your cause. But not enough to forego anymore blogging. Sorry for backing out, but I only ever joined to make fun of you and glorify myself. Also, you're smoking hot.
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Ironically, while I was digitally dead, I had my greatest E-success. Not being able to blog or tweet, I decided to make a Hitler Parody video regarding the Iron Bowl (here). I spent about a half hour writing subtitles, linked it to a couple message boards, and expected that a few hundred Auburn fans would find it moderately amusing.

The ensuing deluge of views, comments, tweets, &c. was truly a sight to behold. At last count, my video had been viewed 8,500 times. People claim to have laughed so hard while watching it that they spit drinks on their monitor/keyboard and wet their pants. Although, with Auburn fans, it is likely that they would've done this with or without the video...

In 8+ months of Blogging, I've been trying as hard as I could to go "viral" with limited success. The Country Double Crossing posts were the most read items I'd ever written, generating a couple thousand page views over a 2 to 3 day period. How funny, that as soon as I joined the Alicia Keys thing and digitally died, I had my most successful Internet moment. Only the Razor...

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I'll see ya.