I spent most of yesterday afternoon trying to rationalize why someone would open a Twitter account for the sole purpose of following people named Adam Thomas. I could probably understand it if she was following her friends, co-workers, bands she likes, and people named Adam Thomas. Just the Adams? No idea.
Around 10:00 p.m., just as I felt my brain beginning to stabilize from the shock of this enigma, I ran into a guy I know named Deion. I've known Deion for a couple of years, don't like him that much, and usually go to great lengths to avoid conversations with him. To be blunt, he has some kind of mental disability, which renders him borderline functional and socially awkward. His speech is usually random and incoherent.
So imagine my dismay, when finding myself in the wrong place at the wrong time, Deion assaulted my already weakened mind, and carefully crafted concept of reality, with this gem:
"Do you know what happens when you travel 300 million light years?"
Saddled with the baggage of a mind that best handles rational thoughts, I was still trying to grasp the full implication of the question when he volunteered the answer:
"When you travel 300 million light years, your future thoughts come streaming right through you, as if from the past."
What?!?!? This new information very nearly knocked me to my knees. Luckily, I just staggered a bit, and responded, somewhat uncertainly:
"Holy Cow Dion, Did you learn that in a book? And if so, can I borrow it?"
Clearly not my best retort, but under the circumstances...
And when I thought the day couldn't get any stranger? Saw a grown man vomit all over another grown man.
Realizing that I couldn't take any more, I went home, crawled in bed, and (taking nothing for granted) prayed that the Sun would come up today. Friday dawned as expected and I look forward to having a very normal weekend. At least as normal as possible given that it's Halloween and the freaks will be out.
See ya
Welcome to Adam's Razor, most notable for ranking ahead of Facebook, Google, and Youtube when listed in alphabetical order.
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