Dead horse officially beaten...

Regular readers of The Razor are no doubt aware that I have expended considerable energy lately lampooning the State of South Carolina (you can read my recent comments on S. Carolina here and here). In an ironic twist, I nearly found myself traveling there this weekend.

My ladyfriend has some family business to attend to, and asked me to come along. In an ordinary year, I'd be delighted to visit such a lovely state. This isn't an ordinary year. This is an election year. And in S. Carolina, you know what that means: sexual deviants line up to compete for the states highest office, "The Luv Gov".

For those unfamiliar with S. Carolina's sordid political past, I'll re-cap. Gov. Mark Sanford got caught last year "hiking the Appalachian trail" with his Argentinian girlfriend. His wife was not pleased. Luv Gov. Sanford is term-limited this year, he can't run again. The women of South America are distraught, but many suitors have lined up to take his place. Distinguishing herself from the pack of would-be Playgovs, Nikki Haley. Mrs. Haley, buoyed by two sex scandals of her own, just finished first place in the Republican Primary.

Which brings me to my point. In a primary election, to win, you must collect 50.1% of the vote. With four candidates in the recent primary, Mrs. Haley fell 5226 votes short of the needed plurality. As a result, a run-off election has been scheduled for June 22nd. So Mrs. Haley has less than 2 weeks left to round up the 5000+ votes she needs to secure the republican nomination. What method of "politicking" do you think she'll use? I'll give you three guesses.

Combine the pace at which Mrs. Haley's is going to have to "campaign" and her known penchant for bloggers, and I just don't feel comfortable spending the weekend anywhere near S. Carolina. I fear she may love me up so fast I won't even be able to show her my State of Alabama Voter Registration Card.

Fortunately, Christena and I were able to "reach across the aisle" and come up with a compromise. I'll travel with her to the border between Georgia and S. Carolina and spend the weekend in Statesboro, Ga. Should be fun. At the present time, there are no plans to document the weekend with slideshows or youtube videos. Readers caught celebrating will be punished.

Do you mind one more South Carolinian political tidbit? The curious case of Alvin Greene (click the link, it's worth it). He just won the Democratic nomination for U.S. Senate. He did so with no campaign headquarters, no party support, no contributions, no job, no computer and no cell phone. He got 58% of the vote with no political infrastructure at all! Amazing.

He's also facing a felony charge. He is accused of showing pornographic images to a college student last October. I don't want to be cynical, but is that a crime? In South Carolina, showing pornography to a registered voter is called campaigning.